its midnight..
i was looking at her blog..
thinking..
thinking like i've nvr think b4
u speak like some people are invisible
that hurts
u speak like people dun give a shit
that hurts a lot
u love somebody else like its nobody business
that kills
imagine
every single day
HE blogs abt, how much he loves that other woman
U read it EVERYDAY
how would u actually feel la
happy? sad? hatred? crushed?
at first, i thought
having all of them at the same time is btr den hatred alone
i was dead wrong
i'd rather have one of those only
having all of these
screws me up inside out
u have changed
u said i was insensitive
you are
u said i treat u differently
LOOK WHO'S TALKING MAN
look who's talkin..
right now
i wish
i can NEVER LOVE AGAIN
no emotions
happiness, sadness, pain, anger
all of those
are better off gone
i'd rather
hang that same expression on my face everyday - nothing
i'd rather
totally ignore one's existence
even thou lookin at that person ( female) gives a lil gentle twitch in my heart
im willing to give up all these
inexchange to pull out that damned blade frm my heart
instead of lettin the blood flow continuosly
my herat
is withering
im abt to give up on life
with i doubt anyone out there cares a shit

dun ignore me
end my misery
for my soul's been long gone
wandering out there alone
save my body
find my soul
keep it in a jar
dun let it wander gone
keep me safe
or just destroy me
watever it is
just end my misery

damn
every moment of my life seems meaningless
i shld be happy
but im not
i dun even have that strength
to hang that bloody fucking fake smile anymore
nth satisfy me
nth can, nth will
a pact with de reaper would be made
take away my strength to love, my power to smile
in exchange for those wonderful emotionless days
i dream...













that im dead