i guess im ok now, in sch..
still cant help but to kinda emo at home..
looks like im not gonn stop bloggin
i realised tat i need to say things tat i wanna say
coz it soothes my heart
by a bit thou...
today was tough
i thought of.. askin u
for another chance..
gimmie one more chance
to jio u
i realised that i want u, and i need u
and tat u made me discover things abt myself
and u changed me a little by little everyday
im a selfish, computer freak porno nuthead
i seem to be biased against girls tat i like
coz when i like a girl, i'ld dao almost everyone else in this world
i said ALMOST
and i tend to crave for de chance to spend time with her
without caring if she really wants me there
when im angry
i'll juz blow
and forget abt wat de effects on de girl my actions would do
im a little bit of funny
but my jokes are usually kinda porno
i decided to stop
because u made me realise this
i realised, studying is important
in fact playin is important too
u juz gotta balance these stuffs
and make ur life enjoyable
u made me realised all these
and i wanna change
not because of u ( well mayb a little)
but, for my future too i guess
the studyin part might be a tough thing to accomplish
and i need help on it obviously
u might give me a second chance
but i doubt ur heart will
watever it is
i'll do watever it takes to make u happy
even thou its as painful as
for example, organising a date for u and ot
i would, at most i'll wither alone at home
but i noe i'll feel tat little bit if happiness inside me
because i know u're smiling

sorry for the anti-christian comments
i was being childish and selfish once again
i should have seen this coming
i guess i did
but i chose to walk towards that pit
because u're inside there
and u liked it
i was harsh and a stupid ass idiot
but i dunno why u'ld thought of tryin to convert me
mayb i'll be a christian in my nxt life
if there's such thing as nxt life
but definately not in this life
coz im a pure-hardcore-free tinker here
to me religions and believes are juz crap
an excuse for human to explain the seemingly impossible
making a lie to cover an inexplainable matter
these are wat i think of all religions and believes
no offense, juz stating
i noe, all these
dun have any chance to change ur heart
i juz wish
i could go back to time
to when me, u and bryan were happily together in 2J
and restart everything
so i could work harder to get u
i have a goal
and look who's standing on my finishing line :)
YOU, my dear
u're my trophy, my honor, my award, my achievement and my accomplishment
i wish that i shld have noticed ur feelings towards me
when it was that big and hot
grasp that opportunity which i failed to figure out
now the fire as died and im mourning here
regrettin for wat i've done and wat i didnt do
if there's really a god somewhere
be Him frm christanity, buddhism or indian
pls help me on one of my greatest wish in life
to be more than juz frends with tyan wei
or even btr
turn back the damned time for me
back to where i was with tyan wei, and bryan
when i first talked to her
and make me realise my love for her sooner
so that, things wouldnt be this disasterous
i wish
my wish
may it come true
i wish... ha...